Sorry to burst your bubble

I”m going to do it.  Discuss the false promises of cohousing.  These are the things commonly promised. They may happen, they may not.

Free child care – maybe. If the parents want to arrange that.  But are they good caretakers?  Do they have your same parenting style?  There is more to this than meets the eye.

Senior care – I think most are honest about this. They agree to check in on people daily and maybe help with light chores and shopping, but intense care is something you will need to hire out.  Yes, it’s nice to know people may notice you haven’t been outside in awhile instead of smelling your decomposing body.   When I was in Mexico, they knew I was sick right away because I hadn’t opened my door and left it open for light and visitors as usual. Then, they would visit and make sure I was okay.

The lawn mower – you won’t need to buy one. There will be one for everyone. Actually, it should be a pretty big one since you now have more grass to cut. Or other gardening tools. Now that they are shared there are other issues. What if someone breaks it while using it for their private property instead of common areas?  And, you can always share tools and lawnmowers with neighbors if you form an agreement anyway. Or, hire a lawn maintenance company. That could be a way for many to save the planet (depending what chemicals they do or don’t use).

Coho cures death. I’ve heard it again and again. You will live longer if you live in cohousing. Really? Yes, loneliness is an epidemic but if you find yourself with people who are boring, not really like you, bullies, etc.  That can make more stress. I ran away because I choose flight when I’m stressed and I had never had such a bad experience before. There is no worse loneliness than the loneliness in the place that is supposed to cure loneliness.  The cliques. The fractions. All the meetings and work to do. Again, it’s a balance thing. It may be your thing and you live longer. Or you may find a place with more peace and quiet and choosing a place of worship, a book club, and being around family give you the social life you need – like my mother did.

About CJ

I was a Spanish teacher for 5 years in the Public School system in 3 different states. I homeschooled and taught at a democratic free school. I heard about cohousing in 2010 and wanted to move in right away. I met a group building one in 2018 and got to move in the summer of 2019. It only took a year to want out.
This entry was posted in marketing in cohousing, moving in and out of cohousing, Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Sorry to burst your bubble

  1. I loved this! I was always taught “Nothing in life is ever free!”

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