Hijackers in cohousing and intentional communities

I think every cohousing community is hijacked by at least one person. It could be someone who demands all the sympathy, attention, or makes all the decisions.  Maybe they have to okay something before it’s on the plenary agenda or it just doesn’t make it to the meeting. Or it is someone who demands that the whole community be meat free and doesn’t feel comfortable at the common meals because there is meat.

My response is tough.  That’s sad you don’t feel comfortable in the common meals but that is your chosen reaction. I’m sure the community would be willing to compromise and have some meals that have meat and others that don’t.  But to ask the whole community to bend to your will?

It is a similar theme I keep getting to. How does an intentional  community make a place where it is accessible to everyone but not overwhelmed by one?  How do they not try to people please so much that the next thing they know, they’ve changed who they are to the whim of one person. What if someone had an idea like the Great Turkey Drop in WKRP in Cincinnati? Could you be the community, or community member, that says no?

About CJ

I was a Spanish teacher for 5 years in the Public School system in 3 different states. I homeschooled and taught at a democratic free school. I heard about cohousing in 2010 and wanted to move in right away. I met a group building one in 2018 and got to move in the summer of 2019. It only took a year to want out.
This entry was posted in bad behavior and bullies of any age, group think and cults, other blogs and websites, Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

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